The biggest reason marriages break up is problems in communication. Marriages are marked by disputes. It is a couples’ style in dealing with differences that makes the difference between a viable marriage and one that fails.
Mediation is a facilitated method of dispute resolution. It is conducted by a trained and experienced mediator, who has taken courses in conflict resolution. Mediation is often used to help people reach agreement – in the workplace, in the courts, in family businesses, and in family conflict. It is different than therapy because it focuses on practical solutions and not assessment, diagnosis and treatment.
By using standard mediation techniques such as reframing, expressing interests and needs, and learning how to use active listening, faulty communications can be changed and angry interchanges can be lessened. It is amazing how much misunderstanding goes on in a marriage — even a marriage of many years. A marital mediator is skilled at finding these miscommunications and bringing them to light. This will make a couple feel good about each other again, thereby furthering and preserving the marital relationship.
In addition, marital mediators (if they are also divorce mediators or divorce lawyers) generally have experience in the financial matters relevant to marriages. These financial disputes can cause great distress and bitterness in a marriage. Financial matters can be addressed directly with the mediator who can analyze the financial data, and bring in experts where needed.
Some marital mediations resolve with the development of a postnuptial agreement. Some do not, and are transformational mediations that can transform your marriage into a more happy and successful union.